Get the 411 on relationship issues!
I got into an argument with my boyfriend, because he liked another girl’s photo on Instagram. He said it was nothing and she is a friend, he doesn’t want other girls and that I should trust him. I asked to see his phone and he said no. If he has nothing to hide, why won’t he show me his phone? I went through his phone when he was in the bathroom and couldn’t find anything, but maybe he deleted messages. I was cheated on in my last relationship and now I don’t know if I can trust him.
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to our Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It sounds like you have been through a really hurtful past relationship, where your trust was betrayed. After experiencing a betrayal, it may feel difficult to trust other people again. It’s important to remember, that your new partner is not your old partner. It is not fair to your partner to make assumptions based on the actions of a completely different person.
Healthy relationships involve respect. Your partner has a right to privacy, and if you feel that he is untrustworthy have a conversation with him about healthy ways to build trust and communicate with each other your wants and needs.
Lastly trust is a choice, and building trust in your relationship takes time and effort. If you feel unable to trust other people your partner than you might need more time to heal before getting into a relationship.
My partner said they love me last night, and I don’t think I am ready to say it back.
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to our Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It can feel like you are pressured to say I love you after a partner says it first. Feeling in love and expressing love to a partner that can happen at different times for different people. If your partner says it and you don’t feel the same way yet, that’s okay — just because you don’t feel ready to say it doesn’t mean you don’t have intimate feelings for them. Communicate with your partner by telling them how it makes you feel to hear them say it and tell them your own goals for the relationship.
Me and my partner have been fighting a lot and they say really hurtful things to me. They call me fat and stupid. Last week they yelled and embarrassed me in front of our friends. I got upset and teared up again I was called stupid and accused of crying for attention. I tried to end things, and my partner apologized. I said I would think about staying with them, but I don’t know what to do. My best friend says its abuse but they have never hit me. Am I overreacting?
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It sounds like you have been going through a really tough time. It’s brave of you to reach out for advice. Conflict is normal in any relationship, but your arguments shouldn’t turn into personal attacks. It seems like your partner is using power and control in your relationship. If you have a moment follow this link to view the power and control wheel. In this wheel you may recognize more than one way your partner has been using power and control. You are not overreacting! Your partner may not have physically abused you, but emotional abuse can be equally painful and is still unsafe. Figuring out the next steps can be hard. Ultimately it is your decision if you want to stay in the relationship or end it. It’s important to make a decision that prioritizes your future. Whatever choice you make; we are here to give support and help you plan for your safety.
I really like this person. I have been there for them any time they need me to vent about ex partners. Every time we hang out, I pay the bill. All this time I thought they were into me. When I tried asking them out and they said no and they wanted to just stay friends. How can they treat me like we are a couple, but then reject me?
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It sounds like you developed strong feelings for your friend. It must have been hard to express your feelings for them to find out they don’t feel the same way. It’s ok to feel hurt by the rejection, but your friend is not obligated to be in a relationship with you. Just as you are not obligated to be in a relationship with someone you don’t have feelings for. It is important to respect their choice. Keep in mind friendships can also be unhealthy. All of your relationships should be respectful. That means everyone feels comfortable communicating their needs without fear of what another person will do in response. If you feel If you want to have a healthy friendship with this person try setting boundaries by communicating with them how you feel when they vent to you. If you do not want to foot the bill every time you hang out, let them know how it makes you feel. Thank you for your question, and we hope our answer helps, please contact us for any other questions or concerns.
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to our Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It sounds like you have been through a really hurtful past relationship, where your trust was betrayed. After experiencing a betrayal, it may feel difficult to trust other people again. It’s important to remember, that your new partner is not your old partner. It is not fair to your partner to make assumptions based on the actions of a completely different person.
Healthy relationships involve respect. Your partner has a right to privacy, and if you feel that he is untrustworthy have a conversation with him about healthy ways to build trust and communicate with each other your wants and needs.
Lastly trust is a choice, and building trust in your relationship takes time and effort. If you feel unable to trust other people your partner than you might need more time to heal before getting into a relationship.
My partner said they love me last night, and I don’t think I am ready to say it back.
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to our Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It can feel like you are pressured to say I love you after a partner says it first. Feeling in love and expressing love to a partner that can happen at different times for different people. If your partner says it and you don’t feel the same way yet, that’s okay — just because you don’t feel ready to say it doesn’t mean you don’t have intimate feelings for them. Communicate with your partner by telling them how it makes you feel to hear them say it and tell them your own goals for the relationship.
Me and my partner have been fighting a lot and they say really hurtful things to me. They call me fat and stupid. Last week they yelled and embarrassed me in front of our friends. I got upset and teared up again I was called stupid and accused of crying for attention. I tried to end things, and my partner apologized. I said I would think about staying with them, but I don’t know what to do. My best friend says its abuse but they have never hit me. Am I overreacting?
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It sounds like you have been going through a really tough time. It’s brave of you to reach out for advice. Conflict is normal in any relationship, but your arguments shouldn’t turn into personal attacks. It seems like your partner is using power and control in your relationship. If you have a moment follow this link to view the power and control wheel. In this wheel you may recognize more than one way your partner has been using power and control. You are not overreacting! Your partner may not have physically abused you, but emotional abuse can be equally painful and is still unsafe. Figuring out the next steps can be hard. Ultimately it is your decision if you want to stay in the relationship or end it. It’s important to make a decision that prioritizes your future. Whatever choice you make; we are here to give support and help you plan for your safety.
I really like this person. I have been there for them any time they need me to vent about ex partners. Every time we hang out, I pay the bill. All this time I thought they were into me. When I tried asking them out and they said no and they wanted to just stay friends. How can they treat me like we are a couple, but then reject me?
Hey,
Thank you for reaching out to Safe Dating Teen TextLine. It sounds like you developed strong feelings for your friend. It must have been hard to express your feelings for them to find out they don’t feel the same way. It’s ok to feel hurt by the rejection, but your friend is not obligated to be in a relationship with you. Just as you are not obligated to be in a relationship with someone you don’t have feelings for. It is important to respect their choice. Keep in mind friendships can also be unhealthy. All of your relationships should be respectful. That means everyone feels comfortable communicating their needs without fear of what another person will do in response. If you feel If you want to have a healthy friendship with this person try setting boundaries by communicating with them how you feel when they vent to you. If you do not want to foot the bill every time you hang out, let them know how it makes you feel. Thank you for your question, and we hope our answer helps, please contact us for any other questions or concerns.
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